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At one time or another, we’ve all had to deal with petty tyrants at work—people whose reason for existing seems to be to make other people’s lives as difficult as possible.

I once had a guy who worked for me who delighted in telling our part-time staff “no” whenever possible. If he could send them away for not filling out a form correctly, or for calling with a question instead of completing a form, he would gleefully (and self-righteously) do so. He knew that, if I caught him at it, I’d over-rule him and make him respond appropriately, so he went to great lengths to hide these things from me. He would even whisper on the telephone—as though, sitting 20 feet away, I couldn’t hear what he was saying. It was maddening and, I confess, I never found the secret for making him understand that his job was to provide service to these workers, not think of ways to make them jump through more hoops.

Bad Bosses

Managerial bottlenecks are even worse. I’m not just talking about  micro-managers, either, but bosses who can’t seem to let go of anything. Sometimes they’re considered  “hands-on” or “shirt-sleeves” managers, but there’s a wide gulf between “hands-on” and “driving your staff nuts”.

These types never go on vacation Or, if they do, they pack along cell phones and laptops, check in every morning, noon and evening, and monitor their e-mail and phone-mail lest the slightest thing escape their attention.

They think that no one can do it as well as they can and, usually, they’re proven right. It’s not because they’re smarter than everyone else; it’s because they never, ever trust any subordinate to do anything, so their people give up and just pass it all along to the boss.

Help Your Staff Succeed

If you want your staff to succeed, you need to let go of the reins. Contrary to what many managers think, a well-run department or company thrives on independent thought and action. I’ve always believed that an outstanding manager can go on vacation any time and nothing will change. All the work will get done just as well; decisions will be made; people will put forth their best efforts; it’s almost like having the manager there.

That’s because an outstanding manager makes sure that his or her people are well-trained, have all the resources they need every day, have the authority and responsibility to handle 99% of the things that come up at their own level, and trusts that they will make competant and professional decisions.

Jim Stroup discuses this further at Managing Leadership. Carol Hymowitz at the WSJ has another take —what if it’s your boss who can’t seem to cut the electronic apron strings?

What are your thoughts on vacationing bosses? And what do you do when faced with a controlling gatekeeper in an organization? Leave your stories and thoughts for everyone to share.

Priscilla Palmer has put together a magnificant list of seemingly everyone you’d want to know about in the field of personal development. Check it out, and if you have any faves to add to the list, let me know.

 

Liar, liar, pants on fire!

We all remember that silly childhood taunt. Unfortunately, it isn’t an adequate response when dealing with a liar at work. (It sure would be fun to shout it at someone, though, wouldn’t it?)

I worked at a performing arts center and the day after a big event with lots of stars on hand, my boss called me in to her office and said that one of the VP’s told her that I had stood with the press photographers in the main entrance to take personal pictures of all the stars coming in. It was a silly lie, because not only did I do no such thing but it was ridiculously easy to disprove.

I told my boss where I had been standing (outside, behind the ropes, with some other VP’s and senior management). And when I got my pictures developed I took them in and showed them to her. Most of the photos showed the back of lots of heads and barely-recognizable celebrities. She had to agree that either I wasn’t where this VP said I was, or I was the worst picture-taker on the planet.

So, why did this woman lie about me? I have no idea, except that we had clashed over event issues several times. Maybe she thought this would be a good time to get me in trouble.

Regardless, though, I was very disappointed in my boss for even half-believing that I would do such an unprofessional thing. We had an excellent working relationship, but after that I was always conscious of a barrier between us.

Dealing With the Lie

So, how should you respond when someone tells a lie about you at work?

1. Ask them why. If it’s a rare occurrence, take the person aside and say, “Gee, Bob, I can’t believe you told the boss I didn’t get the project figures to you on time. You and I both know you had them on your desk two days before they were due. Why in the world would you say something like that?” Be polite and civil, and give the person the benefit of the doubt, and a face-saving way to get out of it.
   


2. Ask them why again. If it happens again, confront the person publicly. Let’s say that good old Bob has shafted you again in a meeting. Raise your eyebrows and calmly say, “Wow, Bob, where did that come from? I put those figures on your desk two days ago. Why in the world would you say that I didn’t?” Then sit there and wait for the explanation.
   


3. Correct the lie. Make sure that your boss (and anyone else who might have a vested interest in the information) knows that you didn’t do what the liar said you did. Don’t just let it, um, “lie” there. You don’t have to be mean or vindictive, but you do need to make sure the truth is out there.

Frank Roche on KnowHR Blog inspired this post, so check it out for more “liar” tactics.

Have you ever had to deal with a liar, either at work at home? Drop me a note and let me know how you handled it and what the outcome was.

One of the most challenging parts of working with clients who are looking to make a life change is to get them out of their limited focus of who, exactly, they are.

When we look at who we are professionally, most of us tend to describe ourselves in a very narrow way. “I’m a teacher”; “I’m a plumber”; “I’m in IT”; “I’m a waitress”. These descriptions don’t really tell the whole story and they don’t begin to address the actual talents and skills we have. So when clients say, “I want to change my job. I’m a Hospital Administrator. What other kind of hospital administration can I do?”, I gently nudge them towards thinking about using their skills, talents and passions in new ways.

Maybe they coach Little League, work on an organization fund-raiser, or act as secretary for a homeowner’s association. Maybe they golf, or fish, or paint landscapes or salsa dance. There’s a reason they do these things that they enjoy, and if we can extract some of that passion and translate it to a career that person is going to much happier and a bigger asset to whatever company they work for.

Steve Roesler is starting a 3-part series on mid-life career change. Have a look, and let me know what you think. Here’s Part 2 of Steve’s series. It’s an interesting and thought-provoking essay on how different stages of life affect our career (and other) decisions. I remind myself often that I didn’t get where I am overnight; I’ve now gotten to a place in my life where I’m spending time revamping myself and what I call “work”. All in all, I think I’m getting “better”, not “bitter”!Part 3 of Steve’s series. Well, sort of. It perfectly describes days I’ve had. Can you relate?