Now that everyone and their cousin is on Facebook, you’ll probably run across this problem—what do you do if your boss asks to “friend” you?

Phil Gerbyshak tackles this timely issue on his blog, reminding us that navigating the friend/no friend waters can be tricky and loaded with unexpected hazards. His advice to not cross the personal/professional line is standard good business. Read the whole article here.

I wonder, though, if this isn’t a generational issue that some of us are on the “wrong” side of?

From what I hear, younger workers (and their often equally young bosses) don’t have the same views on keeping work and personal life separate as dinosaurs like me have. If you’re working in a hip, tech-oriented company and your whole department is all over social media, then connecting with everyone on Facebook is probably the modern equivelent of the water cooler—everyone who’s anyone drops by several times a day to keep up with the latest news. In that case, not joining in could brand you as an outsider, unfriendly, out of the loop, or just not a team player—any of which could mean death to your next promotion.

Regardless of your company culture, keep your Facebook (and Twitter) profiles clean, well-groomed and ready for public inspection at any time. Even if you do decide not to friend your boss, your info can easily get passed around by friends-of-friends and your boss could end up seeing something you’d rather she not know about.

I’m curious—what do you think about bosses and employees connecting on Facebook? Would you/do you do it, and why or why not?

As another year winds down with unemployment still hovering around 10%, you might be wondering what you can do to make sure you don’t become a statistic. While it’s difficult to predict what the future will bring to the U.S. job market, it’s clear that now is an excellent time to make an investment in your future.

Here are some top choices for things to do career-wise in the coming year:

1. Network. One of the things I hear most often from clients is, “But…I don’t have a network.” I’ve said this before, but it bears repeating—the time to start your network is not when you need it. You need to be connected to other people in good times, so if the bad times hit you have a place to turn for help. LinkedIn, Facebook and Twitter all are excellent places to reconnect with people from your past, or stay in touch with people you meet now.

2. Keep Current. Stay on top of the latest news in your industry and on what your competitors are doing. Read local, national and international news with an eye for events or trends that may impact your field, and then come up with strategies to prepare for changing market conditions.

3. Learning. Take advantage of training opportunities through your company as often as you can, but also consider broadening your expertise and skills into new areas. Tap into credit and non-credit classes at your local community college, or invest in some online webinars or podcasts to increase your knowledge base.

4. Attend Events. Get out and meet new people at local professional events. Social networking is great, but nothing beats personal, face-to-face interaction. It’s a chance to put your best self forward and lets you put faces to names.

5. Be Professional. Come to work early. Take on extra projects without whining. Don’t pass on gossip. Be polite and helpful in all your communications. Present a clean, sharp, well-put-together appearance. Mind your manners. Don’t tell off-color jokes or post drunken pictures on your Facebook page. If you don’t respect yourself and others, don’t expect the boss to view you as a company asset.

6. Mentoring. Find someone you can relate to and ask if you can pick his or her brain occasionally about career and work issues. At the same time, be on the lookout for someone just starting out who you might be able to help navigate through the things that trip a lot of people up. Always try to pass on what you’ve learned and pay it forward. Remember—no matter how new or inexperienced you are, there’s always someone who knows less than you and who would be grateful for your counsel.

What are your career “resolutions” for the new year?

Since the focus of my business is career and job issues, I hear from a lot of people who say, “Wow—with all these people out of work, your business must be booming!”

Well, not so much. Yes, there are a lot of people looking for work, and still more who are fed up with their current job situation, so you’d think this would be a prime time for signing up new clients.

All I can say is, I’m getting a lot of tire kickers. They want to look at the shiny new life they could have, and they might even test-drive it with one of my get-acquainted sessions, but when it comes down to digging deep and plunking down cash to own that life, they hesitate.

Surely, they think, I don’t need to pay someone to tell me how to find a new job. I’ll just send out more resumes and something will come up. Besides, I’m too young/old/female/minority/in the wrong industry/unskilled/over-qualified; no one is going to hire me anyway.

Or, they say, my job isn’t that bad. Heck, at least I HAVE a job. I should be grateful. Anyway, this isn’t the time to take a chance on a new career. I’m fine. Only ten (or twelve, or fifteen) more years until retirement and then I can relax and enjoy myself.

And you know…on the suface, it’s hard to argue with that.

The thing is, I don’t believe you need to wait another minute to start living the life you want.

Relaxing and enjoying yourself doesn’t have to be ten or more years down the road. Wouldn’t you rather be enjoying yourself now? and, to put it bluntly, what if that “ten years” never happens? Life is uncertain, and betting on the come isn’t always the best strategy.

Years ago, when I first met my husband, one of my aunts was dithering about buying a new car. She had decided what she wanted ahead of time but, walking into the dealership, she saw a beautiful, shiny new gold Cougar. Suddenly, the car she had planned to buy didn’t seem so perfect. But…the Cougar was about $2000 more than she wanted to spend.

She went home and called me for advice. Michael got on the phone with her and said, “Listen to me. Remember all those people on the Titanic who passed up dessert. If you want the car, buy it.”

She went back to the dealer, bought the Cougar, and never regretted it. She even lived long enough to trade that car in for another one.

So, as 2009 draws down to the end, ask yourself—are you ready to own your life? Are you ready to step up and take the leap into a happier, more fulfilled “you”? Are you ready to drop the negative thoughts, the whining, the “nothing goes right for me” attitude?

If you are, I’m ready for you!

A word of warning—once you decide to take responsibility for your life, and for what you create, you can’t go back. It’s a step forward in faith, and there’s no do-over.

My promise to you…once you decide that “good enough” isn’t good enough for you, and you focus your attention on how you feel, you’ll see amazing things start to happen.

You don’t need to do it alone; I’d love to share it with you, so take the first step, and let’s talk. You have nothing to lose and, even if you decide not to pursue coaching with me, I guarantee you’ll learn something new and useful to guide your journey.

If you’re confused or uncertain about your future, not sure where to go or what’s needed to be competitive in today’s job market, or just looking for some help in the new world of social networking, your answer is here.

My friend, Phil Gerbyshak, has put together the clearest and most comprehensive step-by-step guide to this notion of “branding” yourself I’ve ever read.

Whether you’re looking for a new job, or want to improve the one you have, or you’re ready to step out on your own with a new business, you owe it to yourself to read—and heed—this guide. And it’s completely free—right on Phil’s blog. No sign-ups, no downloads, just there for the taking.

Now, go get started.

The website Online Colleges offers a lot of useful and timely information about alternatives to standard college programs.

They recently added a comprehensive list of the 50 Best Career Books for College Students. Take a look at the list, and then check out their other offerings. Whether you’re a college student already, looking forward to college someday, or your college years are behind you, there’s tons of great info here.

My good friend Steve Roesler shares some simple and very useful steps for effectively coaching employees (and others). While you’re on his blog, sign up for his new free eGuide—“Coaching Managers to Coach”. Whether you’re a manager, a professional coach or an aspiring manager, this eGuide is something you’ll refer to on a daily basis.

Thanks to Steve for including me as a small part of his eGuide—I’m pleased to have contributed to a valuable resource that I think a lot of people need, and will actually use.

If you’re looking for work, you know there are a lot of “how-to” books out there. Here is my list of the top ones you should read. All (or most) of them should be available at your local library, so you can stimulate your mind while not depleting your pocketbook.

The Job Search Solution: The Ultimate System for Finding a Great Job Now by Tony Beshara. Full of real world advice and not your standard, generic fodder, Beshara’s book challenges readers with a unique vision of the business world. Chapter 12 (Overcoming Employer Biases that Can Keep You from Getting a Job) will be of special interest to older workers or those who have been out of the workforce for an extended period.

The Pathfinder: How to Choose or Change Your Career for a Lifetime of Satisfaction and Success by Nicholas Lore. Beyond having a “great career”, this book tell you know to have a “great life”. Even if you’re not actively job-hunting, you owe it to yourself to read this—you’ll come away with a new direction and maybe some life-changing insights.

Passion at Work: How to Find Work You Love and Live the Time of Your Life, by Lawler Kang. Kang’s book is as much about learning who you are as it is about career success. His Process of the 5 Ps leads you through a step-by-step blueprint for realizing your dreams.

I Don’t Know What I Want, but I Know It’s Not This; a Step-by-Step Guide to Finding Gratifying Work, by Julie Jansen. Whether you’re unemployed and unsure of what to do next, or suffering an existance in a mind-numbing job, Jenson’s book can help you find your way out of the fog. The book includes some helpful quizzes and questionnaires to get you on your way.

Escape from Cubicle Nation: From Corporate Prisoner to Thriving Entrepreneur by Pamela Slim; forward by Guy Kawasaki. Before you go all Johnny Paycheck on your boss, read this book. Everything you need is right here.

The Networking Survival Guide: Get the Success You Want By Tapping Into the People You Know, by Diane Darling. No matter what the job outlook is, networking is THE key to getting the job you want. Darling breaks networking down into small, doable pieces, reminding readers “From your first conversation in the morning until your last conversation at night, you are networking.”

101 Great Answers to the Toughest Interview Questions by Ron Fry. Getting through the interview is something that makes most of us break out in a cold sweat. This book walks you through the most difficult, pitfall-laden questions you’re likely to encounter and helps you work out the best way for you to answer them.

Resume Magic: Trade Secrets of a Professional Resume Writer by Susan Britton Whitcomb. Quite simply, one of the very best books written about resumes. A must-have if you’re crafting your own resume, and a useful resource even if you’re having a professional write one for you.

Can I Wear My Nose Ring to the Interview? A Crash Course in Finding, Landing, and Keeping Your First Real Job by Ellen Gordon Reeves. If you’re a recent grad, you probably feel left out by the advice in a lot of career books. Here’s one that understands the needs of young job-seekers and answers the questions other books never ask.

Instant Interviews: 101 Ways to Get the Best Job of Your Life by Jeffrey G. Allen. Jeff Allen completely rewrites the rules on job search and  teaches you how to land actual interviews – fast! Organize your overall job hunt strategy and learn little tricks of the trade that get you hired.

How to Land a Top-Paying Federal Job: Your Complete Guide to Opportunities, Internships, Resumes and Cover Letters, Application Essays (KSAs), Interviews, Salaries, Promotions, and More! by Lily Whiteman. If you’re looking for a federal job, you can’t do any better than this. Whiteman lays out every step in what is arguably the most intricate, difficult, time-consuming job search process anyone can ever undertake—working for the federal government.

I’m sure there are other great books—please hit the comment button and share your best recommendations!

In this difficult job market and stalled economy, how can someone in mid-life (a Baby Boomer) be sure he or she is making the best choices for a happy and successful life?

Join me and my guest Kim Kirmmse Toth, of Positive Aging, Inc, as we talk about challenges and opportunities for Baby Boomers, or anyone facing a career or life transition.

Listen to Career Momentum Radio live at 6:30 PM Eastern on Wed, 9 Sept, or get the replay at any time.

In my last post, I listed 11 tips from actual hiring managers to help you make a positive impression at your next job interview.

Here are 10 more things they wish you knew, before you showed up in front of them.

1. Emphasize what you can bring to the job rather than what the job can do for you. This isn’t the time to share how you hate working weekends, need to leave at 5 PM every day, and really, really hope the people in the work group are “easy to get along with”.

2. Be enthusiastic. Enthusiasm for the job is a vital characteristic that an interviewee needs to possess. While a little nervousness is understandable, the person who does not smile or seem to want the job usually does not get the job. Don’t be afraid to show a little personality during the interview and allow the interviewer to get to know you as a human being. Similar to many other aspects of life, we like to work with people we like. If you are likable during the interview, and pretty much meet the job qualifications, you’ll be hired before someone who is more qualified but who sat there like a turnip during the interview.

3. A firm, confident handshake is crucial. A great handshake and eye contact are vital to making a good first impression—and this goes for both men and women. Being weak in both of these areas can get the interview off to a bad start. Your handshake and eye contact are indicators of your confidence level and your ability to interact easily with co-workers, company leadership and customers – all critical relationships in a business.

4. The hiring manager does care about your happiness on the job. If you aren’t a good fit for the company culture, or don’t seem like you’ll mesh with the team, you won’t be hired. It isn’t personal; not everyone fits in well with every organization and, if you’re miserable, you not only won’t stay at the job very long, there’s a good chance you’ll make the other team members miserable too.

5. Be realistic about the market value of your background and skills. Your pay will be based on your experience and value to the organization, not to your needs or your lifestyle. Don’t ever tell the interviewer how much you “need” to make.

6. Show that you’re prepared. Bring a notebook and list of questions. Have copies of your resume available. Be ready and able to discuss points on your resume that speak to the key requirements of the job for which you’re being interviewed.

7. Make it easy for the hiring manager. Don’t assume he or she knows your resume by heart; chances are, yours is one of 5 or 10 being considered. Point out the parts of your resume that are specifically relevant to the job and be prepared to elaborate on what’s written.

8. Follow-up appropriately. A hand-written thank you note is a must; if you don’t send one, it says you don’t care. An email or phone call a week later is appropriate; numerous or increasingly aggressive calls or emails are the kiss of death.

9. Present quantifiable facts. Don’t just say, “I helped improve sales”; say, “I instituted a customer tracking program that increased repeat sales by 28% in the first six months”.

• Sample comment: It’s not about who could do the job; it’s about who has done the job, how well they’ve done it, and how they compare to the other candidates.

10. Don’t lie. Hiring managers and HR depts agree—they DO verify all the info on your resume; they DO check your Facebook and LinkedIn pages; they DO check all your references. Try to pull a fast one, and you’ll be out on the street no matter how good your interview was.

I’d love your thoughts on either of these posts—go ahead and hit Comments and share! 

Thanks to the following people for sharing their expertise with me for this article:

Lorne Epstein, author of “You’re Hired! Interview Skills to Get the Job”
Tim Maly
Cory Huff , Social Media Specialist
Robert Haufler, Dir of Marketing
Robyn Feinsod, Graphik Dimensions Ltd./pictureframes.com, Mgr of Marketing & Merchandising
Dagmar Eisenbach, Mgr, Global Campaigns at HP
Sarabeth O’Neil McAuliffe, Corporate Office Manager
Shawn Desgrosellier, Pres of Vitality Grp, a Dallas based Exec Search firm  
John Haynes  Human Resources Professional
Tom Gimbel, Founder and CEO of The LaSalle Network
JR Rodrigues, Co-founder, Job Hunt Express 
Clint Cora , Author of “How To Get A Dream Job In Pharmaceutical Sales – Direct Inside Advice and Guidance From a Sales Manager”
Stephanie Lilly  VP of HR, Providence Life Services
John Care, author of “Mastering Technical Sales : the SE Handbook“ 
Greg Szymanski 
Maureen Mack, HRPrincipal 
Kathleen Rich-New, Clarity Works Consulting 
Thomas Ellsworth, CEO of GoTV Networks and author of “The Rat, The Race, and The Cage: A Simple Way to Guarantee Job Satisfaction and Success”
Dan Erling, CPC and Vice President of Accountants One
Allison O’Kelly
Erica L. Nasser, PHR  HR Manager,
Natalie Holder-Winfield, Esq., QUEST Diversity Initiatives, LLC
Kari Clift, CPC, Kore Koncepts 
Ann Hammel, Principal & Executive Coach at L2: Learn & Lead LLC
Chris Laggini, VP of HR, DLT Solutions, Inc

With all the job hunting going on right now, I get a lot of questions about how applicants can put their best foot forward and get hired.

To get the best information possible, I went to the source and surveyed a group of hiring managers. They shared the following tips—things they won’t tell you at interviews, but sure wish you knew before you came in the door.

1. Know your stuff. Before any interview, do your homework and research the company. Very few candidates do this, so if you are one of them you’ll immediately set yourself apart. Research the industry and, at the very minimum, read every page of the company website to learn more about clients, services, management and competitors. Read the company press releases to find out what their latest projects are. Utilize websites like LinkedIn or Google to learn the background of the people you’ll be meeting.

• Sample comment: “I have always been astounded when I ask the question ‘Do you know what we do?’ only to get a response like ‘I sort of have an idea.’ “

2. Show that you’re a good match for the job and organization. Tell the interviewer how you see yourself fitting into the company and what value you’ll be able to add quickly. Show that you’re a team member who’s willing to go to the mat, and that you’re not just in the job until something better comes along. Strong commitment and positive attitude often go further than actual skill—as long as you’re teachable, open to feedback and a quick study.

3. Don’t be late. Allow yourself enough time to get lost or delayed in traffic. Make a dry run the day before so you know exactly where you’re going, the best way to get there, and where to park. Have the phone number of the interviewer with you so if you’re unavoidably delayed you can call and see if you should still come or if another time would be better.

4. Don’t be early. If you’re really early, find a place to freshen up a little bit and wait until your appointment. You can present yourself 5 – 10 minutes before your interview time, but no earlier. The interviewer is on a schedule and doesn’t want to see you until the appointment time.

5. Dress appropriately. This sounds simple, but too many people show up for an interview with dirty, unpressed clothes, uncombed hair, and/or needing a shower.

• Sample comment: “If someone wants a job in my office, they need to show me that they are capable of looking the part. If you would wear it to the gym or the grocery store late at night, it’s probably not good for an interview.”

6. Practice the basics. You know you’re going to be asked the following: “Tell me about yourself”; “What are some of your weaknesses?”; “Tell me about a time you disagreed with your manager”; “Why do you want to work for XYZ Corp?”, so have well-crafted, concise, intelligent and creative responses ready.

7. Make the interviewer’s job easy. The interviewer is probably almost as nervous as you are. Anything you can do to make his or her job easier will be a huge boost for you. Remember—it’s a conversation. Don’t hog the discussion, tell rambling, self-serving stories, or make the interviewer drag information out of you piece by piece.

• Sample comment: “I wish they knew that I don’t care about past paychecks or stories, just what they are going to do for me and how they will help this company get to the next level.”

8. Prepare intelligent, thoughtful questions. The questions you ask the interviewer are as important to your suitability for the job as the ones the interviewer asks you. Note: asking about pay, benefits or time off at the start of an interview doesn’t qualify as either intelligent or thoughtful.

9. A professional, polished resume. These things will get you put in the “no” pile immediately: typos and grammatical errors; a generic resume with no specifics; an inappropriate email address (a real example: prettyhotandtasty@hotmail.com); a cover letter that’s not keyed to this particular job. When emailing your resume as an attachment, use your full name in the file name, as in “Susan Jones Resume” and not “My Resume”.

10. Don’t forget your manners. Introduce yourself politely and remember the interviewer’s name. Don’t take a seat until offered one. If someone else comes into the interview and is introduced to you, stand up. Say “please” and “thank you”. On the way out, thank the secretary or receptionist—and make sure you got his or her name, too. Send a hand-written thank you note within 24 hours of your interview.

11. Ask for the job. Too many candidates hold back for fear of looking too eager or too anxious. If you think you’re a good fit for the job, and you want to work for the company, say so. It shows your passion for the opportunity and your willingness to take a risk and try to close the deal now.

More tips…

Check back tomorrow for 10 more things hiring managers won’t tell you (but wish you knew).

Thanks to the following people for sharing their expertise with me for this article:

Lorne Epstein, author of “You’re Hired! Interview Skills to Get the Job”
Tim Maly
Cory Huff , Social Media Specialist
Robert Haufler, Dir of Marketing
Robyn Feinsod, Graphik Dimensions Ltd./pictureframes.com, Mgr of Marketing & Merchandising
Dagmar Eisenbach, Mgr, Global Campaigns at HP
Sarabeth O’Neil McAuliffe, Corporate Office Manager
Shawn Desgrosellier, Pres of Vitality Grp, a Dallas based Exec Search firm  
John Haynes  Human Resources Professional
Tom Gimbel, Founder and CEO of The LaSalle Network
JR Rodrigues, Co-founder, Job Hunt Express 
Clint Cora , Author of “How To Get A Dream Job In Pharmaceutical Sales – Direct Inside Advice and Guidance From a Sales Manager”
Stephanie Lilly  VP of HR, Providence Life Services
John Care, author of “Mastering Technical Sales : the SE Handbook“ 
Greg Szymanski 
Maureen Mack, HRPrincipal 
Kathleen Rich-New, Clarity Works Consulting 
Thomas Ellsworth, CEO of GoTV Networks and author of “The Rat, The Race, and The Cage: A Simple Way to Guarantee Job Satisfaction and Success”
Dan Erling, CPC and Vice President of Accountants One
Allison O’Kelly
Erica L. Nasser, PHR  HR Manager,
Natalie Holder-Winfield, Esq., QUEST Diversity Initiatives, LLC
Kari Clift, CPC, Kore Koncepts 
Ann Hammel, Principal & Executive Coach at L2: Learn & Lead LLC
Chris Laggini, VP of HR, DLT Solutions, Inc